Hedgehog Politics

This is my desk at work. The post it note in the corner was balled up and thrown at me from an adjoining cubicle. It reads "The guy behind me just called Ryan Seacrest a genius. Where did my life go so wrong?"

Up Too Early

Driving to the airport. 4:30 am.

Me: Wow, the moon is even BIGGER now!
Dad: I keep telling you, it's because we're getting closer.
Mom: It's dented though.
Me: What a piece of junk.
Dad (sadly): Should have hung it up with a screw, not a nail.

And That's the Day He Started to Refer to Her as Iron Fist in His Head

In the library.

Father: Go tell your sister two minutes.
Little brother: Dad says two minutes.
Big sister: You may be quiet now, thank you.