Friday, May 06, 2005

The Saga of Dune is Far from Over

Becky and I have been watching the Sci-Fi Channel's adaptations of Frank Herbert's novels Dune and Children of Dune over the past few weeks, and we finished today. As Inigo Montoya would say, You killed my father. Prepare to die. . . . No, that's the wrong one. What I'm looking for is, Let me explain. No, there is too much; let me sum up:

In Dune, the following things happen:
William Hurt and family move to desert planet. Hurt gets hurt. Sulking son Paul fulfills prophesy as savior of planet known as Muad'Dib, becomes considerably hotter in process of doing so, due to spiking of hair. As Becky would say, Shizit! Also features many wild hats and wicked cool worm-riding. Most Horrible/Awesome Moment winner: Liet's death-by-spice-blow. But Frank, I liked him!

Anyway, the saga of Dune is far from over.

In Children of Dune, the following things happen:
Muad'Dib continues to be unbearably attractive, produces unbearably attractive children. Some stuff happens with rebellions, the obese floating man reprises his role from the original series, and a lot of people we liked go insane and/or die and/or wander off into the desert at various points. But the saga of Dune is far from over: the actor who played Liet is recycled as a completely different character. The worms, thankfully, reprise their original role. But the saga of Dune is far from over! There are still approximately three hours of footage of Muad'Dib's perpetually half-naked son! Even with worm-skin, it has to be said: shizit.

[I want to mention that despite the fact that Muad'Dib's son looks like a well-built 16-year-old, he was actually 24 at the time of filming. I will cut anyone who mentions Jeremy Sumpter . . . or Rupert Grint. I am having an alien baby and my hormones are all over the place. Watch yourselves.]

Anyway, Children of Dune was, I think, even better than the original Dune, as the acting is superior, Alec Newman being particularly impressive, and the villians are not as asinine (although I have to wonder who thought Susan Sarandon deserved those bangs. What did she ever do to you?) Also, it was interesting to see how the magnificent revolution in the first series fell apart in the second, and how Leto, O Inexplicably Naked One, brought Muad'Dib back to the status of a human being. I personally think Muad'Dib's loss of divinity was a direct result of his spiky hair going flat, but that probably isn't a sound religio-political analysis.

Thus, as The Beckly Hath Commanded, I have written of Dune and Children of Dune, the Sagas that are Always Far from Over No Matter How Close They Are To What Is Actually the End Until they Make Another and If They Do I Hope It Includes Flashbacks of the Spiky Hair.

7 comments:

Lindsey said...

you're having an alien baby? will you name it slartibartfast? pretty please?

Matthew said...

... my vote's still in for Mortimer.

And in the very off chance you find yourself humming worm-riding music, I have the scores to both the ORIGINAL 70s movie, the Sci-Fi miniseries remake, AND Children of Dune. :P Even though I know very little about any of them. This is because I am hording scores for when I am old and too feeble to go to the store, so this way I will always have new music from now until the end of time.

Simon and Ivan said...

Actually, now that you mention it, the music was awfully good for a Sci-Fi series. I mean, these people also make movies called "MOSQUITO MAN" so you have to limit your expectations. But it was good music, although I feel as if they must have basically copied the Gladiator score because I kept expecting the Gladiator theme to show up and was always disappointed when it didn't. But hey, I'm all for more Gladiator. I lurve that music.

P.S. I'm not naming the alien baby anything until I see what it looks like! Jeez, people. Let's be practical.

Lindsey said...

very wise. it could be insanely attractive and then you would have to name it alan cumming or something...

Anonymous said...

Yes, I have been obeyed. This only confirms my wonderfulness.

I agree that Alec Newman did a particularly wonderful job, and I think that he did recapture some of the hotness at the very end, even without the Spiky Hair. As for Susan Sarandon, I think you're missing the real question, that being: what did she do to deserve the EYEBROWS for God's sake, the EYEBROWS? And I don't need confirmation that Leto is really 24 to feel no shame about my overwhelming love/lust for him. The Stomach Which Does Extraordinary Things When He Laughs justifies everything. Everything, I tell you!

.Maeve said...

please, do the badness justice: MANSQUITO!

Simon and Ivan said...

LOL i must have only seen that commercial 1.1 million times instead of 1.2 million, like you.