Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Hedgehogs on the Rampage

So it turns out Lindsey and I are both experiencing mental breakdowns tonight, which is cool. Much better than launching into raving madness alone. I myself am dealing with this by staring at my computer and failing to write anything. The computer screen is so bright it makes my pupils hurt because I refuse to turn on any lights because I can't handle the heat from the lightbulbs. You might think that at this point, a little extra heat wouldn't matter, but in this case it is the difference between mere anger and debilitating rage. It's so hot I don't even want to watch TV.

(That means it's really hot.)

Becky, who was here for an UBER-FUN visit, can attest to the fact that certain portions of my keyboard do not work in the heat. I now have a witness. Of course, after subjecting said witness to hours of lunacy, my driving (I swear to The Lord Above in whom I do not so much believe: I am quite capable when I know where the hell I'm going), and the sun, dirt, and bad English accents of the Renaissance Festival, AND a diet consisting solely of bagels, cream cheese, and Cheez-Its, she may not be willing to testify.

By the way, Beckly, Mary definitely does not get married at the end of The Secret Garden. I guess Hallmark just wanted to hire Colin Firth? I hold no grudge against them for that.

For the remainder of the evening I think I shall sit here listening Coldplay which I can't hear properly over the damn fan, and whimper quietly. Jen offered to be my guide whenever I decide to depart for Alaska. Apparently she is "well-versed in the customs of the north" and can make friends with timber wolves, whom she claims are "misunderstood." Also, she already has a coonskin cap. I'm thinking of going tomorrow. I cannot possibly sit around here for another day.

6 comments:

Lindsey said...

you can solve your breakdown by moving to alaska. i shall ignore loved-ones and kick babies. maybe some kittens too. watch out kittens, i am feeling mean.

The Anonymous Hedgehog said...

I think that's equally acceptable. although there are spaces open on the Alaskan expedition if you decide to come.

Lindsey Rundell said...

will there be provisions brought on said expedition?

The Anonymous Hedgehog said...

Goodness, yes. Primarily fancy cakes: preservatives mean they travel well, fat content means we can live off them if we get lost.

.Maeve said...

LOL. katie, jen, AND fancy cakes? i have lost any desire to live in the continental US. alaska ho! we can take pictures with puffins and the northern lights.

The Anonymous Hedgehog said...

who knew alaska would draw so many followers? as soon as i collect my sled dogs, it's puffins or bust!