Sunday, March 26, 2006

the internet knows all.

In college, we would consume large amounts of alcohol and attempt projects that involved skills like "coordination", "creativity" and "the ability to see straight". Why we threw back three bottles of wine and decided to finger paint my room, I will never know. It's not an endeavor I will attempt again, but college is good for lessons like that. On another occasion we decided to bake... The night is rather hazy, but I do remember the cookies catching fire and screaming "EVERYONE GRAB A UTENSIL" and people trying to fling flaming snickerdoodles into the sink. We were hungry and decided to eat the cookies anyway. Upon our initial taste test we realized we had rolled the dough in salt and paprika instead of cinnamon and sugar.

What triggered this tragic memory? Well, lately everything I eat has been tasting very, very salty. Things that have no business tasting salty... cookies for example, cookies I haven't had a hand in baking. I googled my symptom, "everything tastes salty" and learned I'm either dehydrated or I have brain lesions. I'm trying to decide if this diagnosis is better or worse than the plague.

I think I'll go drink some water.

3 comments:

Simon said...

Obviously worse. How many times do I have to tell you how awesome the plague is?

Ivan said...

you're right, it's worth dying to experience sputum.

simon said...

you know, at first i was all, "omigosh! a convert!" but then i started getting these vibes from your comment that i can only describe as . . . sarcastic. i guess i'll have to google brain lesions and see whether or not they can top the plague in terms of "how cool would it be, if you had to die, to die of [blank]?" project!