Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Three conversations from the past 24 hours that I did not anticipate turning out so weird.

Frazzled Borders Employee: Can I help you?
Me: Yes, I'm looking for a book by Michael Largo, called Genius and Heroin.
Puzzled Borders Employee: Cheese and Heroin?
Me: GENIUS... and Heroin. It's supposed to be in the Family section, but I don't see a Family section.
Disturbed Borders Employee: It is not in Family. It's in Death & Dying.

Postal worker: Anything fragile, liquid, or perishable?
Me: Well, there's a kind of a bouncy ball that's got liquid inside it. It's not water, but I don't know what it is, maybe glycerine or something.
Postal worker: waits for me to figure out what on earth I'm talking about
Me: There's glitter in it.
Postal worker: Oh, it's a glitterball.
Me: Yes!

Dermatologist: Say goodbye to your mole.
Me: Good riddance, mole.
Dermatolist: Wish it well.
Me: Farewell, mole.
Dermatologist: Have a nice life, mole.
Me: Well, this has been fun.
Dermatologist: Yes, I enjoyed it.


Ivan said...

you have a strange preoccupation with death... though it might be balanced out by the mailing of a glitterball.

Simon said...

I really don't! That book sounded really interesting! It's less about death than creativity. At least I think so. I haven't actually read it yet. But I'm really looking forward to it.

megan said...

I enjoy your dermatologist.