Transit of Venus

Since Simon & Ivan invented quasars and all, it seems only right that we should say something about happenings in the world of astronomy, such as the Transit of Venus last Tuesday. We should like to confirm that Venus did indeed transit successfully, but after such an arduous journey -- the second in eight years, which it feels is a little much to ask -- it took to its bed and refuses to get up again until we promise to make it some calves'-foot jelly and hold its hand for an hour or so every afternoon until it's quite recovered. When assured that it need not perform this feat again until 2117, it said peevishly that it should "bloody well hope not" and pulled the covers over its head.


The photographer wishes to be credited as "R. M. Jurnack, Historian, Esq.," for reasons known only to himself.