frustrant

things that currently anger me:
i live in southern california.
i live in southern california and for some reason the heat is constantly running in my apartment.
i live in southern california and i can walk outside in a t-shirt WHY THE HELL IS THE HEAT ON IN MY APARTMENT.
i live in southern california and i get called a "fucking bitch" for turning the heat off in the apartment. who DOES that?
my absolute inability to parallel park.
my absolute inability to meanuever my car in the "reverse" position. i was at a gas station and everything was full except one pump but it was the cheapest gas i could find so i went to the free pump even though i had to BACK into the spot. it took like four tries for my brain to process which direction i needed to turn the wheel. you could see fear in the other drivers eyes as i pulled forward and had to try AGAIN. what's wrong with me?
the fact that my tofu never cooks right. should it be this mushy on the inside? do i need to charbroil it or something? i'm almost positive flame-cooked tofu is the answer. hand me my blowtorch.
i cannot find a post office where i can mail my valentine's day presents. saturday: post office closed due to a power outage. sunday: all post offices closed. monday: post offices close at 5:00, who knew? tuesday: post office i was going to vist on monday was actually demolished a week ago. this is getting out of hand.
a spider drowned in my shower. this should have served as a warning to the EARWIG that camped out all night behind my shampoo bottle (doesn't anyone read this blog?). i even checked for this vile beast before i got in. i am not a cold-blooded killer but if you are going to sit like a COWARD behind a tube of brilliant brunett you deserve to die. darwin approves.
i put my license plates on all by myself. i put the front one on and realized, wow, i'm missing the back one. where could it be? oh wait, yes, i think i screwed them both onto the front. so much for saving time by doing it right the first time.
my mother is a lunatic. i hope she finds happiness before she ruins all our lives.
chocolate is good. it's so good i stopped at vons to buy a bag on my way home. it's so good i had to eat half the bag in the car. whoops.
i ran 189 stairs 5 times to counteract the half bag of chocolate i ate and now i can't walk. i look absolutely deranged whenever i try to go down the stairs because my calves sieze up and i feel compelled to roll the rest of the way. such issues...