Friday, March 05, 2010

Spring Comes to Simon's House

Last night I killed a large piece of lint with a shoe. That's because earlier in the day I found a white spider crawling on my pants. Somehow the idea that a spider could be on you without your knowledge opens up the possibility that there could be spiders everywhere without your knowledge. And they could be invisible. And they could have evolved wings. And they could be carrying concealed weapons. This is a season that requires constant vigilance. And Raid.


Ivan said...

I am constantly battling lint that looks JUST LIKE BEDBUGS... I pick it up and realize it is, yet again, something from a knitting project. drives me nuts.

Simon said...

Lint is very deceptive!

Matthew said...

White spiders are bad, but not as bad as invisible giant squid.

P.S. This post TERRIFIED Adam, who will no longer be setting foot in your apartment, much less falling asleep there were the spiders could STRIKE.

Simon said...

True. I cannot argue that an invisible giant squid wouldn't be at least as bad, if only because you would not be able to defend yourself with a shoe.

However, a squid is unlikely to suddenly descend from the ceiling, brazenly aiming for your head, as happened to me once LAST spring. It's the coming out of nowhere that really bothers me. Even an invisible squid is so large, you really couldn't help but notice it because you'd trip over its tentacles.

I have now officially give this too much thought.