Monday, July 11, 2011

Doctor Who is Always Pertinent

Me, yesterday:

Mr. Magpie: "I just want things back like they used to be!"

I have been watching a lot of Doctor Who while lying like a ragdoll in my big blue chair moaning quietly to myself which always makes me feel better when I'm sick. My pathetic condition has not stopped me from making some observations about the happenings on this show that are now driving me insane:

1. All alien races are always entirely homogenous. While this does explain why the Doctor likes humans so much (they are legitimately the most interesting of all the species on the show), it seems highly unlikely from an evolutionary point of view.

2. Whenever the Doctor says something is impossible ("But it cawn't be! That's impossible!"), it clearly isn't, because it's right in front of him. Duh.

3. Whenever the Doctor says some alien is the last of its kind, ninety million more of them come barging in with lasers. Really, I'm starting not to trust his judgment.

4. Also, why are so many aliens the last of their kind? What is going around killing all but one of everything? Half the time it seems to be the Time Lords, which leads me to believe the Time Lords were rotten people and maybe I shouldn't be so sad that the Doctor is the last of his kind, because his kind were evidently quite dangerous.

5. Aliens are always hungry, and what they are hungry for is humans. I am willing to believe that they want human brainpower or something, but I am not willing to buy that they want human flesh. Why would you land on this planet and eat humans? Humans are not meaty, not in relation to, say, cows. How about an episode where instead of having to save the entire human race (again), the Doctor has to save all of bovine kind?

I can't think of anything else. Which is pretty good, as far as a list of complaints born of a cranky and feverish state go. My list of complaints for Spooks is much longer. Starting with, is it really necessary to play Arabic flute music every time you show a terrorist? Come on.

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