Let's begin with this story about the tea she sent: "Bush tea: a surly tour guide made us some of this by putting it in a metal tin and attaching the tin to a chain. He then swung it around his head 10 times. It was so obvious he hated his job I bought some of the tea. It was good tea." I can only assume that after you drink it, you're immune to bitterness and dissatisfaction. Because it all got sucked into the tour guide.
There was also this terrifying creature, of which Ivan says: "Befana: Italian Christmas witch - who needs Santa when a hideous hag can enter your home to leave gifts! You don't even need to feed her cookies! Win! I found her at the Piazza Navona Xmas fair - she was the only one that didn't scream 'MADE IN CHINA' so I instantly fell in love."
Ivan's closing admonition: "Cherish her." Thanks, Ivan. She's hanging from my ceiling where she is certain to scare away evil spirits, burglars, and probably all my friends.
Last but not least, it's been too long since we spoke of dugongs. Have we ever spoken of dugongs? I'd be surprised if we haven't, for Ivan is slightly obsessed with them. I'm convinced the sole reason she went to Australia was to see dugongs, and perhaps to purchase this stuffed animal:
Please note that this is a dugong and NOT a manatee. I called it a manatee by accident and Ivan DID NOT LIKE THAT. Matt called it a "grumpshunk," however, and that amused her to no end, so frankly I feel she was a bit harsh with me. I was much closer than Matt was.
Ivan explained all the other presents, but all she wrote about the dugong was this:
Dugongs, they are self-explanatory.
Thank you for these and all the other delightful things, Ivan! I will cherish them.
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